Recently, I was discussing the difference between discussion and argument. Later, whilst thinking about the same, I also remembered that this is something that my boss talks about. He cautions us regarding the need to have ‘Samvaad’ (Discussions) rather than ‘Vivaad’ (Arguments).
So, in a random exercise, we asked people what was the difference between an Argument & a Discussion. We were amazed at what kind of answers people had to give. Let’s take a look:
è “A discussion is an exchange of information, but an argument is a contest of wills”
è “In an argument people are usually more focused about making the other person agree with them. During a discussion people both explain their ideas and listen to the other persons ideas.”
è "Arguments are done with an end result in mind and discussions are held with the outcome decided in the meeting."
è “During an argument.. there is a break-down in respect and dignity for the other person”
è “An argument is when one person refuses to contribute to a discussion, and a discussion is when both people participate”
è “An argument is a heated discussion”
è “A discussion, you may get something resolved. An argument, just a headache”
More often than not in life, in the daily chores, we tend to forget the bigger picture. We continue to believe that what we are thinking is absolutely correct, and in the belief of experience, proximity, efforts, we keep on fighting for proving ourselves right! Whilst we hear what is being said, we do not listen to it really. So when, a ten year old comes and tells you that Twitter is changing the way world converses, you snub him saying that he’s spending too much time on the internet these days and that he should focus on his studies, and a few months down the line, you come to know that you are missing so much of relevant information as you are not on Twitter. You heard. You didn’t listen.
In an organization, having ‘Samvaad’ and not ‘Vivaad’ becomes all the more important! ‘Samvaad’ leads to the growth of ideas and self, while ‘Vivaad’, only satisfies ego. It closes the open doors and sometimes, does result in strained relationships which in turn results in decay of organizations. Nobody is always right. But the one who accepts this fact about self, is wise.
So next time before a meeting, please introspect and prepare yourself for Samvaad and not Vivaad.
Very true , vivad - more often than not revolves around me v/s you , aiming at a win loose ending; While samvad and vivad , broadly speaking are forms of discussion - Samvad as rightly articulated in you blog, leads to an environment that nurtures ideas and positive participation.
ReplyDeleteYes, discussion is much more a free flowing conversation about the topic while an argument is a sort of quarrel because it suggests that two or more people are disputing the validity of the topic under consideration...
ReplyDeleteAbove surprising definitions of arguments!! First of all a discussion can never be productive without argument.Argument is subset of discussion.In a meeting if there is no argumentit means participants in meeting r YES men.
ReplyDeleteAs far as ur take on SAMVAAD n VIVAAD I wud end up commenting"In today's corporate world,outcome of a meeting are preplanned.Barring exceptions Meetings r organised to impose or put words in one's mouth by management.Some organisations do it thru cool meeting and some do it thru dirty meetings.
Sunil Singh
reports1973@yahoo.com
For me the Summary is :
ReplyDeleteNobody is always right. But the one who accepts this fact about self, is wise.
Keep Writing Sir.
Sir even I extended Samvaad Meet with Team and results were encouraging. Lots of ideas born and I am confident of it to be result oriented. It works.
ReplyDelete